To Choose Wings

Every morning, I wake up and my brain begins its daily assault on that precious moment between sleep and wakefulness. My body is still deliciously tangled in soft, warm sheets, and my mind starts pestering me. “Hey, when are you going to text that person back? Do you know what you’re going to say? What about…” Working, drafting, listing, tasking. Peace is already a ghost. Should I just check my phone and start the slog?

Some days I make that choice. Jump into the deep end and start swimming. “I’ll feel better once it’s all done.” (But is it ever done?)

On days when I dive right in, it’s like running with my shoes untied. I haven’t taken the time to get grounded in what’s really important and move at a pace that FEELS good. “EVERYTHING IS AN EMERGENCY” urgency twists my stomach into knots and tells me the only way to unknot it is to start running. But, what if there’s another way? A slower way. Where I feel accomplished, and ENJOY myself???

I don’t remember the texts and emails that felt so urgent and important yesterday, or last week, or last year. The list never ends. So why not pave a new path now? Living kind of feels like the only thing that’s urgent anyway…

Sorry, I can’t talk right now.

I need to let this classical guitar talk to my soul.

I need to light this incense and watch the smoke dance toward heaven.

Your time will come.

But now? 

I’m holding a burning match, 

and I have to smell what fire does to wood.

I’ll write that email,

but first, I’m writing the world I want to live in.

I’m chasing the dream that tries to escape when I open my eyes. 

I’m cooking up a recipe for freedom.

A spell that spells:  R-E-L-E-A-S-E  the chains of urgency. 

Let awe transcend to-do lists.

Let me fill me with wonder,

so there’s plenty for both of us.

The mind that prioritizes body prioritizes spirit. 

The choice to check boxes misses the chance to choose wings.