imagine a fire,

a bright, dancing glow. 

its beautiful petals

delight to unfold.

their lips clear a path

with soft, molten kisses.

the power to transform,

igniting forgiveness.

imagine your chest,

pulsing with flames.

alive with love 

as your heart melts its chains.

allow what isn’t yours

to billow away.

ash joins the universe

to become a new day.

watch the fire lick and lap 

at every sore place.

wrap its arms around sadness, 

soothe fear, soften shame.

let its heat meet the edges 

of anger and hate.

sparks fly, as it bleeds 

with their fiery pain.

breathe in fresh air. 

let your lungs fan the flame.

watch it light up each cell, 

free each vessel and vein.

warmth tickles each crevice,

watch how they play.

feel what it feels like

to forge a new way.

Joy. Ease. I had major breakthroughs with them this week. There were still parts of me holding onto fear that I’m not doing my best if I am living my joy and living with ease.

The truth is: BECAUSE I’m living my joy and living with ease, I embody my purpose. I know because I FEEL IT. I am exactly where I need to be, doing exactly what I need to do. There is no question.

channel a poem in 2 minutes

i said

is it possible

could it be any good

is there any point doing it

is there any point brewing it

without sitting down and stewing in it

AH! I caught you! part me that shows up no matter what

first guest to the party

mr why bother

the impossible imposter

i could give myself all the time

and i’m greeted by the same guy

i will ever be enough

so why not, open a portal

in the time it takes to take a shit

take a little word shit

sit on the typing toilet and let it ride

you can push or just let it slide 

let it go

let it flow

after all, you’ll never know

who might read it and think

ha! i’m glad this little turd exists

my day is a little browner for it

no need to edit, no need to stare

just wave goodbye

as it takes flight

and feel the way it feels

to just be light

I’ve bounced from low lows to high highs

so many times. 

So many trips up and down inside. 

Right now?

I’m dancing on air. 

The lightest I’ve ever been,

Always comes after the darkness.

I emerge,

I remember I can breathe again.

And actually, I’m better at it than I was before.

What felt like drowning, was learning to swim.

Retreating in, to find deeper wisdom, and resilience to weather the feelings. 

When I’m in it, everything hurts so bad I forget who I am.

It feels like I’ll be lost forever.

But,

I never am.

Something clicks and I’m climbing out somehow.

Just yesterday, I was upside down, convinced, 

“I’ll never get unstuck.” 

Then something struck.

A block dislodged, and suddenly

I’m in the eye of the storm 

and I can see the clear, blue sky above me. 

Hope. 

Fragile, but delicious.

A tiny sip of fresh air.

My heart opens and I start over.

Doubts come, and I’m easily knocked down by tall towers of who I think I should be. 

The smallness of feeling thousands of miles from my dreams. 

What is right in front of me never seems like enough. 

But that’s a lie.

Faith is hard to hold onto, in the face of so much fear,

so much conviction that it won’t matter.

That I don’t matter.

That my house of cards will fall

(and it will). 

But never building feels like death. 

So I use every, single, brick. 

A smile from a stranger. A moment of self-honesty. A salad because leaves taste like life.

One small “yes” to trusting myself. 

One small step.

Then another. 

Then another.

So if you look up and see a crack,

build toward the light.